Wow... where to begin. First off, I apologize that I have not kept you well informed on all my happenings as of lately. I seriously have been extremely busy lately even with being currently unemployed. Let me begin by being dauntingly boring and telling you what I have been up to. I'm currently working on a screenplay that makes Tucker Max's "I Hope they Serve Beer in Hell" seem like a children's book, I'm getting new headshots taken on Monday and then I'm going to begin meeting with agents, I'm applying at every restaurant in LA trying to land a waiter job so my days are fee, and I'm working on some music stuff. So thats what's been taking up all my time lately. Oh... and I've been running everyday and trying to get back into perfect shape. In-N-Out Burger is not helping me accomplish this goal. Some crazy shit that has happened:
- I went to a party that Tom Morello (Rage Against the Machine guitarist), Noodles (The Offspring guitarist), Terra Patrick (Pornstar), Ryan Cabrerra (Fag), and Shifty (singer of Crazytown and lead on Celebrity Rehab and Sober House) were at. It was at the Roxy and shit was nuts. I actually talked with Shifty for quite awhile and since I'm a fan of Celebrity Rehab it was by far the highlight of my night.
-Today I was on the air for a good two minutes on Kiss FM shooting the shit and talking about girls with Ryan Seacrest. This is not a joke... it actually happened. Ryan Seacrest has a morning radio show on Kiss FM and I called in and we just started talking.
-I have been in LA two weeks now and am still DRUG FREE : )
-If you're reading this mom stop now... I spent the night at a girls house the other night (for confidentiality purposes the girl will remain unnamed) and some crazy shit happened that morning. That night I had been drinking and decided it would be funny to call all my friends at 2 in the morning (it was 2am LA time but it was really 5 in the morning for them.) None of them answered of course but I had a smile on my face knowing I had woken a few good souls. William didn't find this to be funny. So fast forward to the morning. I'm asleep in this girls bed when all of a sudden a loud ass alarm starts going off. I spring up and realize that its my phone ringing. For some reason I had it on SUPER FUCKING LOUD and it was on the most hideous ring tone known to man. There were a few things I didn't realize as I jumped out of bed that morning to shut my phone off: 1. I was still drunk 2. I was butt ass naked. So here I am jumping out of bed naked as a newborn and stumbling drunk to shut my phone off when all of a sudden I step on something really furry. I freak out and think that there is a Raccoon in the house. This was the most logical explanation to me at the time. I then look down and realize its a cat. I now remember that the girl has two cats. I make it to my phone (after having a heart attack from stepping on the fury beast) and see that its good ole' William Taylor calling me at 8 in the morning. The rest of the day seemed to just suck and I owe the start of such a shitty day to William. I will now not jokingly call my friends at ridiculous times because payback is a bitch. I have however made William the gay character in my screenplay I'm writing : )
-I have decided to post a "10 Things I've Learned Since Being in LA" blog once a week. So at least you will have that to look forward to. So here is the first one
10 Things I've Learned Since Being in LA
1. Asians can't drive worth shit (I'm sorry if I offended anyone but not only are Asians known to have small penises but they are now going to be known for sucking ass behind the wheel)
2. Going to run where there are a lot of hot girls running is the best workout motivator in the world (not only do I get excited about going for my runs now but I also seem to move at a much faster pace to try and impress)
3. A beer cost 5 dollars...God must hate LA
4. I found a cool bar that sells PBR for 2 dollars...Jesus loves you
5. I've moved across the country and the first really cool girl I've met is from North Carolina (WTF Mate)
6. You know the economy is bad when you find an ad on craigslist from a restaurant that is seeing people from 2-4 and you show up to find a line of over 100 people applying for the same waiter job. This can be a little discouraging
7. The majority of people out here are actually nice
8. The valley sucks and so does traffic
9. I'm gonna make being broke cool (thats more of a promise rather than something I learned)
10. Dancing to music in your car while sitting in traffic is a good way to pass time (plus people look at you like your crazy and then they smile because they see how good of a time you're having. This inevitably makes sitting in traffic for them less of an irritation and more of a celebration)
I LOVE YOU ALL... William is GAY : )
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